Double the Pleasure, Double the Fun
By Mary O'Neill
From dawn to dusk our home is alight with the
antics, chatter, laughter and occasional cries
of two remarkable little girls. Although it's
been three plus years since Molly entered our
lives and 15 months since Claire arrived home,
I am still in awe that these beautiful babies
are ours. This miracle called adoption has enriched
our lives beyond all expectations.
Our daughters were born in China, Molly in November
1995 in Hefei and Claire in September 1997 in
Jiujiang. Both cities are on the Yangtze River,
though several hundred miles apart. Molly was
placed in our arms on Mother's Day 1996 and exactly
two years later on Mother's Day 1998 we held Claire
for the first time. I often wonder how we got
so lucky.
Molly had been in foster care and was obviously
well loved and taken care of. She is a very loving
and secure child and people often comment that
it must be the result of all the love she receives
at home. And as much as we'd like to take credit
for it, we can't. Molly has been this way from
the very first moment we laid eyes on her. She
had a full-blown personality, which I can only
describe as "engaging." Wherever we
went, Molly engaged people. She makes friends
and is lots of fun to be with. People are drawn
to her smile and she goes out of her way to include
everyone in her play. She likes to make people
feel good and goes out of her way to compliment
them. I can often see her scanning them for something
to comment on; i.e. "I like your belt"
or "You have nice glasses." She's a
pip!
I have often heard people say that God had a hand
in matching them with their children, the fit
is so perfect. I believe that in our case, God
had a hand in picking Claire a big sister. Claire's
early days weren't as good as Molly's, and she
arrived home needing lots of help. She qualified
for the Early Intervention Program and has had
the help of several wonderful therapists. They
had all said that Molly was going to be Claire's
best teacher and this has proven to be the case.
It took several months for Claire to catch up
physically, but once that happened everything
else seemed to fall into place. After months of
being barely able to tolerate touch of any kind,
she initiates hugs and kisses, loves to be carried
around and can rough house with the best of them.
Our passive baby has become a bright, determined,
happy and loving toddler.
Molly and Claire delight in each other's presence.
Their favorite game at the moment is dress up.
They love to put on hats, scarves, jackets, dresses,
gloves and mommy's shoes to stomp around the house.
They play house, originally with Molly playing
the mommy and Claire the baby. Now Claire wants
to be a mommy too, and they both push their strollers
around, chatting away to each other about their
babies. They share books, toys, giggles and food!
They comfort each other when one is hurt and come
to the other's aid when one is in trouble. I've
recently had to give Claire a time out, and Molly
informed me Claire was still a baby and couldn't
be expected to act like a big girl. When I reprimanded
Molly recently, Claire let me have it with a scolding,
that had I been able to understand it, probably
would have stung. Claire's been slow to talk but
very clearly can say, "share," "my
turn" and "my do it!"
For several months, Molly's favorite bedtime game
was playing "adoption." We would recount
her adoption story and act out the packing, travelling
and first meeting. Recently, I overheard her telling
Claire her story. She began "You were born
in China, mommy carried you in her heart, we loved
you the moment we saw your picture." Have
I mentioned how blessed we are?
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